31 July 2011

Sucsexful Boobecue Recipenis Testes

I'd say that's the most profound and intellectual post title I've come up with yet. The purpose of my most recent barbecue was to test some new recipes I've been wanting to try out. Overall, they came out very well. This was also the second meeting of our beer club the Maryland Beer Appreciation Society, which also went well.

My favorite items of the day were my fried pickles with a nice remoulade for dipping, the chipotle brown sugar sweet potatoes, and the coffee cocoa stout barbecue sauce I whipped up. Honorable mention goes to Deana's crab stuffed jalapeno poppers, and Jen's oreo-stuffed cookies (yes, I've decided to use people's full names, that abbreviating shit was getting on my nerves.) And, of course, Karen's amazing apple pie, my favorite. Join me on this epic quest of smoking meats and quaffing brews.


July 30th Barbecue

A little beverage to start the day right. 10:30am isn't too early to drink when you've been up all morning barbecuing, right? Please agree with me so I don't feel like an alcoholic.

July 30th Barbecue

The various components of my brisket rub.

July 30th Barbecue

Ain't it perty?

July 30th Barbecue

Another beer? Don't mind if I do!

July 30th Barbecue

My rib rub, fully assembled. Transform and roll out.

July 30th Barbecue

Whipping up a batch of barbecue sauce. This recipes a keeper for sure (the secret ingredient was a few tablespoons of brisket rub, followed by a quarter cup of that lovely stout pictured above.)

July 30th Barbecue

Something to snack on while I prep my meats. By far the best tomato I've had all year. Our CSA rocks!

July 30th Barbecue

Barbecue sauce bottled in a sweet flask I picked up at Kitchen & Co. for only $3.

July 30th Barbecue

Rubbing my meat is a dirty job.

July 30th Barbecue

July 30th Barbecue

Raw meat rubbed. Meat rubbed raw. Rubbed raw meat.

July 30th Barbecue

I have made fire.

July 30th Barbecue

Rublin' the riblin's. Pigs need love too.

July 30th Barbecue

Smokin'. Or in 8-bit if you prefer.

July 30th Barbecue

What a F'ing gorgeous day. While I do believe we ridiculously overpaid for our house, you gotta love the view.

July 30th Barbecue

Roasted sweet taters.

July 30th Barbecue

I don't remember how many hours in this was... Nonetheless it was looking pretty sexy. Some rib trimmings alongside that would later serve as a midday snack for the chef.

July 30th Barbecue

Sweet potatoes done after bruleeing the marshmallows with my handy dandy blowtorch.

July 30th Barbecue

MMmmmm, pimento cheese. Sweet stanky Lucifer, I love this stuff.

July 30th Barbecue

July 30th Barbecue

The art of making frickles.  Goddamn they were good.

July 30th Barbecue

July 30th Barbecue

Brisket sliced and ready to devour. It was alright. I'd say it was damn good for my first attempt. I erred on the side of caution, leaving most of the fat cap on thinking I'd rather serve fatty tender brisket than lean dry brisket. There's not much of a smoke ring since the temperatures soared early on due to the intense outdoor heat (it was 91 degrees out when I put the brisket on at 9pm Friday night.) The rub also left kind of a bitter aftertaste. Ideal brisket shouldn't require barbecue sauce, but in this case the barbecue sauce was just so good that it really served to elevate the so-so brisket into hall of fame status. I was happy with the results, given the not-so-ideal cook.

July 30th Barbecue

July 30th Barbecue

The ribs were a tad overcooked (fall off the bone status) but, of course, everyone loved them. True barbecued ribs should have a little tug to them. I added a bit too much liquid to them when I foiled for the last hour.

July 30th Barbecue

My plate. I must apologize for the unaesthetic overturned marshmallow. I assure you the top was seriously blackened and delicious. The gorgonzola bacon potato salad was also a winner.

July 30th Barbecue

Jen's absurdly good oreo-stuffed cookies. I came.

July 30th Barbecue

Karen's retaredly fudgy brownies.

July 30th Barbecue

The lineup for the second meeting of the Maryland Beer Appreciation Society (MBAS). The theme of this meeting was brown ale. A damn fine turnout--better than I expected considering I'm not really a fan of brown ales.

I leave you with a visual guide to the making of burnt ends. You see, the packer brisket comes in two sections: the flat and the point. You separate the two sections (slicing the flat to serve) and put the point back on the smoker for additional fat rendering. After 4-6 hours you cube the point and add all kinds of lovely flavor enhancers to it, in this case it was de-fatted meat drippings, the rest of the coffee/cocoa/ancho barbecue sauce, and some additional brisket rub, and then you put it back on the smoker to caramelize the fat even more whilst simultaneously creating a magical crust of epic proportions. So keep this process in mind as you view the following photos. While you're doing that, I'm going downstairs to gorge on some crispety, crunchety cow hunks. Enjoy!

July 30th Barbecue

July 30th Barbecue

July 30th Barbecue

July 30th Barbecue

July 30th Barbecue

I had to pull them off after about 2.5 hours because I wanted to go to bed. The next morning I fired the cooker back up and after an additional 3.5 hours the end result was this thusly thine anthropomorphic cow hunk beef nubblins:

July 30th Barbecue

July 30th Barbecue

July 30th Barbecue

July 30th Barbecue

All hail the supreme manifestation of smoked meats: Burnt Ends. Caramelized fat never tasted so good.

A big thank you to everyone who was able to make it out. And a huge extra-special thank you to those of you who brought me those uber-awesome gifts. You know who you are.

Do you ever wish you had cybernetic laser-bladed claws protruding from your fingertips?  I do.  All the time.

Micro--out.

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1 comments:

Deana said...

10:30 is never too early to start drinking!!

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